I am planning a wedding.

In June of next year, I will be acting as the Maid of Honour for one of the most fantastic women I have ever had the privilege of knowing. Christie and I have known each other for close to eight years; about the same time she has been dating her polar opposite fiancé. I remember the day Christie and I met; we worked at the same restaurant. She blazed through the doors of said eatery declaring her intentions of partying that night.

“Who is down to go out and drown some drinks?!”

Her then platinum locks bouncing in synch with her steps.

“Uh, yah! I am so in!”

My enthusiasm masked the fact that this was not only the first time we had ever met, but the first conversation we ever had. We were nineteen and twenty-two, respectively.

Years later, we have an unshakeable bond that has lasted illness, our one big fight, moving to different cities (and back), and countless first dates and heartaches.

Enter Kate and Ashley; whom we decided together to add to our circle of friends. Kate, tall, with legs for days and gorgeous copper hair fuelled our fire for an active social life and risk taking. Kate was game for anything, laughed louder than most, and was the girl who would pick you up from the side of the road after a terrible first date (true story.) Ashley, the baby of the group with the most stunning blue eyes I have ever seen, was next to join us. She was young in her years but wiser than most; loyal and family oriented; she never met a cocktail she didn’t like. She was the Charlotte York of the group, albeit with a hell of a lot more sass. Together the four of us hit the town, went on trips, cried over the silliest men and truly grew up together.

Eventually, Kate moved 2300 miles away, Ashley went to college, I bopped from city to city to find myself and Christie became a business owner. In the time in-between we all managed to stay in contact. Of course, as I write this, the four of us now live within fifteen minutes of each other, and time has passed. The days of slamming vodka coolers and dancing until 4am are behind us, but we are still soulmates. Yes, things have not always been peachy. In fact, each of us has taken serious issue with someone, about something’s, and there have been moments where we were all not glued to each other’s hip. However, what makes me so grateful is the fact that we are authentic when it comes to our friendships and all agree that there is no time for resentments and dramatics. While we all had major turning points within this foursome platonic love affair, we discuss issues and not topics. We rarely fight, and when we do, we fight clean – no names, low blows or past bull.

Our honesty is remarkable. Unlike many women that I have encountered, we actually talk. It is so important in lifelong friendships to have the cojones to actually be blunt – because at the end of the day we all have our ‘off’ moments. We all piss each other off, we all have attitudes, and we all have misunderstandings. What is so fantastic is that we credit each other enough to squash our issues before they manifest.

While everyone else is so afraid of hurting feelings, we have enough respect for each other to say how we feel. It is not uncommon for us to talk, text and email each other over ten times a day, just to make it known that we are excited about one another, and what our friendships mean. Not only do we plan brunches, pedicures and nights out, we are now all planning for Christie’s wedding – Kate and Ashley are also her bridesmaids. Despite falling outs, dropped calls and broken plans we have such a solid connection and that is due to having the class to be true; to talk as well as listen, and for that I am honoured.

Lucky us.

Stephanie Churma is a freelance writer with focus on Relationships, Lifestyle and Personal Development. Throughout the writing of this column she and all the girls mentioned in this piece sent over fourteen text messages respectively. Contact stephaniechurma@hotmail.com

Photo credit © Николай Григорьев | Dreamstime.com

Tags: friends, friendship, girlfriends, honesty, relationships, wedding