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I don't think I am alone in this line of thinking, but is it just me or does it seem that we are more honest and open with our children now than our parents were with us when we were kids?  I believe that to be true.  What do you think?

Is that a good thing or bad thing?

Here is why I believe we are more open.  I believe my daughter knows A LOT more at this age than when I was her age.  I believe she knows more about every day life, people's struggles, God, body awareness, sex and death.  WOAH now those are some major topics, and she is 10!

Do I think it is a good thing? I do.

Let me pick one of the topics...Death.  Maybe I was just blessed as a child, but I think the only person close to me that died when I was a child was my Paternal Grandfather and I was only 2.  Until I was in my late teens I never experienced the death of a friend or family member.  If my parents experienced either, I sure did not hear about it. Still to this day I am TERRIFIED of death.  I just am.  I am a Christian and a true believer, but lets face it....I like it here.   I don't want to go anywhere any time soon because this life thing really can be fun a lot of the time, and I have two really cute and amazing kids.

Over the past 3 years I have had a few friends die and I have been open to my children about their deaths.  They see me cry for them and I feel they have a right to know why I am crying.  Labor Day morning the most courageous, positive, and inspirational man I have ever met died at the age of  40 of a brain tumor.  He has an AMAZING wife and two young children.  We have had open discussions about his illness, have attended fundraisers where he was present, and played with his children.  I have had to answer very delicate questions from my children about his tumor, why he was unable to see, why he was swollen, if he is going to die, what will happen to him after he dies, and what will happen with his children.  To my surprise, and it really shouldn't be, I was more afraid to discuss the issues than they were.

Why do we all do that?  We never give kids enough credit.  They can take so much more than we think they can.  If we stick to the tried and true philosophy of "answer only what they ask" we can save ourselves a whole lot of panic and fear as parents.  They really can handle it...it is us that can not handle it.

What do you think?

Photo Credit © Bobby Deal | Dreamstime.com

By Mark Lakewood, CEO Building Strong Families National Seminars

Child bullying is a big problem in our schools today.  The main difference between child bullying today from the past is the nature of the bullying and the violence that occurs in the aftermath.  Cyberbullying is becoming a popular and more destructive form of bullying than traditional bullying.  More children today are bringing guns to school to seek revenge on others.  Child bullying has been around and will probably remain for years to come.  Unfortunately, we do not have the power to rid the world of bullying.  The answer to the issue of child bullying rests within us, especially the victims of bullying.  Victims of bullying are never responsible for being bullied.  On the contrary, victims of child bullying have the power in themselves to think, behave, and react in ways that limits or eradicates bullying.  As a society, we spend much of our energy identifying and punishing the bully that we fail to spend adequate time empowering the victims of child bullying.  We should spend more of our energy on the things that we can control rather than the things that we have limited or no control over.  We need to teach children about the power that they already possess.  Let me elaborate on a few issues that parents should teach their children regarding bullying prevention.

Let's first talk about the characteristics of child bullying.  Typically, bullies and their victims share the same characteristic - low self-esteem.  It just depends on whether they internalize or externalize their feelings that will determine if they will become a bully or a victim of bullying.  Typically, negative situations and events in the child's life can trigger low self-esteem.  Externalizing feelings can cause some children to become bullies as they attempt to control their environment to compensate for their lack of control in their family.  For instance, if the parents of a child are divorcing and the child is very upset about the divorce, he/she might feel powerless in his/her ability to keep his/her parents together.  As a result, the child might take out his/her rage on others for purposes of seeking control to compensate for his/her lack of control over their parents' impending divorce.

Given the same scenario (parental divorce), some children internalize their feelings by not talking or acting out how they feel.  Instead, they become depressed and withdrawn feeling like a failure.  Often, they develop a negative image of themselves and their physical appearance.  They look at others and the world around them with shaded lens.  When a bully validates this child's feelings about him/herself, this child often reacts negatively to the validation because he/she feels the bully is correct in their interpretation. 

Often times, children with high self-esteem do not respond negatively to bullies because they already know that negative personal statements made by the bully are untrue and therefore are unworthy of attention.

As human beings, our behavior, thoughts, and feelings are never dictated or controlled by others, situations, and events unless we allow this to occur.  Simply said, others, situations, and events can trigger a reaction based on what we think.  For example, if I do not want to go to work today and my car has a flat tire, I might experience happiness because I do not want to go to work.  On the other hand given the same event (flat tire), I might want to go to work today to take care of some unfinished business.  Because the flat tire might delay or eliminate my chances of getting to work, this situation might cause me anger.  How could the same event in both situations cause two different feelings?  It was not the event at all that triggered the feelings.  It was what I thought about the event that triggered my feelings.  Therefore, manipulating the way we think can alter how we feel.  We have the power to take ownership and control over our thoughts.  We however have limited or no control over specific events, situations, and the behavior of others.  Sometimes, we attempt to control events, situations, and others but become frustrated when our attempts fail.

Now, how does the paragraph above apply to the issue of bullying prevention?  The main goal of bullies is to get their victims to experience fear, anger, or sadness.  Once their victim demonstrates signs of these emotions via the words he/she says, body language, or actions, the bully has complete and total control over him/her.  The bullying will continue until the victim no longer verbally and/or physically displays fear, anger, or sadness in response to the bullying.  The bullying will end once the victim responds the opposite of what the bully expects.

How do we get children to react the opposite of what the bully expects?  This is where role-playing comes in handy.  Parents should regularly sit down with their children helping them learn to react the opposite of what bullies expect.  Often times, this task is much easier when the parent knows what hurtful words or phrases bullies say that makes their children feel fearful, angry, or sad.  Using these hurtful words and/or phrases in role-plays will emotionally prepare children when they are approached by bullies.

It is also important to teach children that they have the power to change or affect the agenda of bullies by the words they use. For instance, if a bully calls a child 'stupid', the child could defuse the bullying by stating to the bully, "That's nice", "How about that", "Oh, well", and so forth.  The worst thing that the child could do is respond by telling the bully that he/she is stupid or make other negative statements.  A negative response will only inflame the situation encouraging further bullying.

In addition, parents should teach and role-play with their children specific forms of body language that differentiates a child with high self-esteem from a child with low self-esteem.  Body language communicates feelings more so than spoken words.  If a child yells at a bully stating that he/she is not bothered by the bully's behavior, the bully knows that the child is bothered because of the yelling.  Lack of eye contact, looking down, slouched posture, lack of hygiene, and low tone of voice can be viewed as symptoms of low self-esteem. 

Parents need to teach their children that bullies rarely get angry at them.  Bullies are typically angry at themselves and/or events that occurred or are occurring in their own life for which they have limited or no control.  Bullies indirectly take out their anger on the ones they could easily control.

Parents should never teach their children to physically fight back when approached by a bully.  The problem with fighting back is that children can get themselves into trouble for engaging in physically assaultive behavior.  Think of it this way - bullies rarely throw the first punch.  They always entice their victim into throwing the first punch.  This way when they are asked who started the fight, the bully could easily and truthfully state that their victim started it.  In addition, there are significant legal ramifications that can arise as a result of physically assaultive behavior.

It is important to remember that physical violence typically occurs after a negative verbal interaction.  Violence typically is provoked and rarely unprovoked.  Therefore to avoid violence, the conflict can and should be defused during the verbal exchange.  This is why the words victims say and their body language are so significant and detrimental to the outcome of bullying.  Recent school shootings suggest that the shooters were bullied by their classmates.  The bullying subsequently provoked the school violence.

Parents should be cautious when teaching their children to ignore bullies.  The problem with ignoring is that the bully knows that his/her behavior is irritating, annoying, and controlling his/her victim.  Therefore, the bullying will continue.

Parents should be cautious when teaching their children to report bullying to an adult without first attempting to resolve the conflict on their own.  Parents should encourage their children to first attempt to resolve the bullying on their own with the skills taught above.  If their children are unsuccessful resolving these issues on their own, they should be encouraged to report the bullying.  If their children automatically report the bullying without attempting to defuse the situation on their own, they will be perceived and labeled as a tattle-tale which will encourage the bullying to continue.

Parents need to teach their children the correct definition of the word 'tattling'.  Some children think that reporting child misbehavior to adults is considered tattling.  Parents need to teach their children that reporting on others just to see them get into trouble is considered tattling.  A child that reports to his/her parents that his/her brother is picking his nose is considered tattling.  Children always need to report to an adult if they were physically, sexually, or verbally harmed by others or if they witnessed others engaging in destructive or illegal behaviors.

It is very easy to feel sympathetic toward victims of child bullying.  However, it would be more helpful to the victim if we are more empathic to their needs by empowering them to diffuse bullying on their own.  As a result, their ability to defuse the bullying would ultimately raise their level of self-esteem and self-worth.

Author's Biography

Mark Lakewood, CEO, is a distinguished bullying prevention expert, author, and speaker with over 20 years of clinical experience as a family therapist.  He provided clinical and consultation services to school personnel and students on issues of bullying and behavior management. He facilitates the "Standing Up To Bullying" Conference, http://www.StandingUpToBullyingConference.com. 

Photo Credit © Monkey Business Images | Dreamstime.com

Help your children to learn limits while enjoying new found time and old treasures.

Surrounded by electronics and enough DVDs to watch until the cows come home, children today are definitely entertained. Our children are also being trained to want the latest and greatest and then cast it aside for the next great thing.

I can relate. I love the ease of someone entertaining me and I am a marketing firm's dream when a new product is launched. Whether shoes, gadget, software, or tube of lipstick. You name it and I just want to try it for myself.

Is this the thought pattern that caused the financial crisis we are all feeling? Some say it is. So how do we prevent this same pattern in our children?

The start of school makes a perfect opportunity to begin a new way of thinking and living.

Transition: Transition your children to a more manageable time allotment for television and electronics. While the American Association of Pediatrics recommends no more than two hours per day of quality programming, the average child watches three hours of television per day. Fourteen hours a week is still a lot of television for a child. Determine the appropriate amount of time for your child and implement.

Free time: Now your children have time that was previously consumed by electronics and television. Encourage them to "go play." They will probably discover one of last year's toys of the minute somewhere in a toy chest or under their bed.

New Limits: Establish a limit on new toy purchases. This can be an especially hard one. Especially when you see the Robosapien toy your child has been wanting at an insanely discounted price. Hold firm. Get creative to establish the limit just right for your family. Is it new toys only at birthdays and holidays? How about new toys only under a certain dollar amount? Regardless of the policy adopted by your family make sure you stick to it. If the Robosapien deal is too good to resist, go back without your child and purchase it for his birthday.

The Result: You will be able to enjoy this time with your children and allow them to enjoy time with you. You may also notice more wiggle room in your budget while your child rediscovers all the great treasures he already has.

Photo Credit © Sebastian Czapnik | Dreamstime.com

Do you want your child to have good manners? What parent would possibly say, "No?" Even Marge on The Simpsons wants her son Bart to have better manners, and rightfully so. The younger you start teaching your child appropriate manners, the more ingrained they become.

Here are three basics you can begin today.

1. Shake hands. Teach your child the art of a proper handshake. According to Dr. John Q. Baucom, author of The Million Dollar Handshake, only 18% of adults feel very comfortable in delivering a proper handshake. The reason he titled his book The Million Dollar Handshake is the same 18% will earn one million dollars more in their lifetime than their peers. A proper handshake includes: firm grasp, eye contact, and full attention to the person you are greeting. Remember, shaking hands is no longer a skill just for the boys.

2. Hold the door. Holding the door for others is not just for boys either. However, if you have boys, please make sure your sons have it in their etiquette toolkit. Holding the door for others shows respect and courtesy. Not only will he impress his future mother-in-law, showing such great manners will most likely gain him promotions in his career as well.

3. Say please and thank you. Teach your child to say the always appropriate "please" and "thank you." These two words are essential in your child's vocabulary and will get her very far in life. You will even appreciate how much better the day flows when these words are regularly used.

To teach your child any manners, you first have to show them how to use them. Yes, this means you will need to use these manners yourself. Your child will emulate the actions he sees you display. Be the role model you want your child to follow.

What manners do you want to make sure your child knows? Please share.

Photo Credit © Monkey Business Images | Dreamstime.com

While there are countless websites and blogs reaching across the Internet, few offer the array of resources presented by the Pampered Pregger & Beyond Community.

The brainchild of Tiffani Lawton, RN, PP&B already boasts 150+ members, growing daily. Members include such professionals as OBs, Midwives, Therapists, Doulas, moms and more. Whether mom or professional, PP&B extends its' educational arm to each; offering a variety of educational platforms and a chance for the professionals to virtually 'strut their stuff.'

PP&B is not just another educational platform for consumers, it is a comprehensive marketing platform for professionals.  Members post information to the community blog and it starts a domino effect of marketing value!  Each week, the posts get sent to the entire membership, then each post is twittered and facebooked, then the posts show up on the off community blog, which then end up in e-mail inboxes around the nation and on the PP&B Facebook Fan Page.  In addition, PP&B offers extremely affordable ad rates and commercial space to the perinatal target market.  Members have the Ginger Tea with Tiffani Radio Show Media players on their own blogs and websites extending the commercial advertising exposure.  Members can post their events and articles for free.  Top it all off with the opportunity to make cash through our affiliate program while adding content to your own site.  Membership to PP&B is a win-win for everyone.

"Pampered Pregger and Beyond is a unique, one-of-a-kind online community for childbearing women and professionals who serve them," says Andrea Schneider, LCSW Perinatal Psychotherapist. "I had the privilege of presenting a "chat" on perinatal mood and anxiety disorders on this site. Tiffani, the founder of PP and B, has tremendous skill in gathering providers in the perinatal field and mothers all over the country to dialogue through cutting-edge technology in the form of online chats, webinars, and teleseminars. She provides a great service to professionals who want the exposure but not the hassle of learning computing techniques and walks you through what you need to do in order to communicate online in these technological formats. Tiffani is tech-savvy and very patient, I might add! Moms who are experiencing pregnancy or postpartum related stressors or mood/anxiety disorders have a magnificent opportunity to have information at their fingertips and interact from their own homes with experts in the field."

Tiffani has been involved in health care for 16 years, 12 of them as a registered nurse. Tiffani worked as a community mental health nurse for two years, before launching into administration and education. In 2000, Tiffani formed Cape Infusion Support Systems and offered IV Certification classes to nursing colleagues. In 2004, Cape Infusion changed it's name to Trinity Health Care Training and offered comprehensive health care training for the post acute care industry including certified nurse aid and medication aid training. Tiffani was training individuals to become certified nurse aids straight up until 2 weeks before the birth of her third son in 2005.
 
After the birth of her 4th son in 2006 and with it a recognition of a need for perinatal education and services, Tiffani trained to become an antepartum and postpartum doula, lactation educator and placenta encapsulation specialist.
 
Four boys keeps Tiffani quite busy, so getting out of the house to provide these services in the community is quite a challenge. Tiffani wove together her experience in mental health, administration and education and developed the Pampered Pregger & Beyond Online Community.
 
Tiffani's goal is to create a network of perinatal professionals, retailers and families so that everything is under one virtual roof...a sort of one stop shopping.
 
Since it is a challenge for Tiffani to get out of the house to teach and offer services, she knows that the challenge befalls other moms who may be seeking support with perinatal mood disorders or the emotional recovery from cesarean. So educational teleclasses are ongoing to help reach and support these women and families. In addition, the free education that she offers through the Ginger Tea with Tiffani Talk Radio Show brings consumers and professionals together and gives professionals the opportunity to strut their stuff while helping others at the same time.

Tiffani brings her experience in training certified nurse and medication aids to the table and will be soon offering a unique forum for individuals seeking certification as a doula or lactation educator.

Whatever the stage of life or the position of profession, PP&B is a welcomed and available resource for all perinatal mamas.

Visit www.pamperedpreggerandbeyond.com.

As I write this, I am sitting here in a kind of quiet shock.  One week ago my second son, David, graduated from high school.  This seems ordinary to most people.  Just two years ago my firstborn son, Chip, graduated from high school. This year he graduated from junior college, so I should be very skilled at this graduation thing, right? Well, listen folks, I am here to tell you that I am in a strange feeling place in my life.

Almost half of my kids are going to be out of my house.  I guess I should feel lucky that Chip stayed around for a couple of years to prolong the separation anxiety-(mine). He moved out and is attending a university this summer.  I miss him terribly. I am no longer what you would call a "young mother". They all have whipped that out of me. I do not think I am "older" yet, either.  I still am strong and capable.  I do feel the impending change in my family dynamic, though.  My "big" boys are going to be gone.  Probably never to live in my house again, (unless, God forbid, they "boomerang".  Please, NO!) I pray for success for them.

I feel so different right now.  I cannot put it into words.  I know we hear this all of the time from
other parents whose kids are graduating and moving on, but it is so very true, "They were just
babies!" They were!  I wonder how all of the years went so quickly. I guess that is what happens when you are in the thick of earaches, spelling tests, school field trips, baseball games, and dance recitals.  You do not realize that they will not be with you very long.  I just realized that I have now been married to my husband longer than I ever lived with my parents.  That is the natural way it goes. My job is to get these kids ready for the world and then let them go.  I always thought this moment was lightyears away.  (It IS when your toddler is up with a tummy ache, or an earache, and all you want is a minute of rest!)  Now I am noticing some quiet times that I am not used to.  Times when I used to be yelling upstairs to get the music turned down, or for them to stop wrestling.  Now it is just quiet.  I guess I am saying that I miss it. (Which is another thing I thought I would never say!)  

I am not the only one who will miss them.  Their siblings who adore them will be lost without them.  David was Mary Kate's "bodyguard" at school!  Nobody ever would bother her as long as he was around.  Will, the youngest boy, learned so much from the boys about sports and how to be "cool".  He will certainly miss them both.  The girls, Mary Kate and Maggie, always loved it when the boys would give them rides and take them for a soda.  I liked the fact that they could go get milk when we were out, or a forgotten ingredient for something I was cooking. I will miss the laughter, the talks, even the arguments!  Our family will be so different.

Next month we take my second son to The United States Military Academy to start on his college journey.  I will be so proud and sad all at once. I know when we say goodbye it will be like someone punched me in the heart and in the stomach all at once. I have been there before, as a girlfriend. I was there 25 years ago saying goodbye to his father when we were kids.  I will miss him so much, but I have to do this. This is his life and what he has worked so hard to achieve. Now I am in the support mode.  

Cherish your kids.  They do not live with you long.  Remember that they have lives, too. Do not wish them away. There are some extra minutes I may have since they will be gone. Hey, I may even get to read books again! I may get caught up on projects I have put off.  Nah!  Who am I fooling!  I will just keep parenting the three kids I have left at home. Maybe, though, I will stop to "smell the roses" a bit more than with the first two. Maybe I will take in everything a bit more carefully with the first two before they leave college and really break out.
As I said, this is hard.  This is something I have never done, but many mothers and fathers have done it before me. I am in good company. Godspeed, my boys!  Mom and Dad love you. Forever.  

A unique approach to story telling and learning, Personal Child Stories creates interactive children's books that are personalized for kids and their needs.  This unique product is the brain-child of Australian born/Arizona dwelling Shara Lawrence-Weiss who founded the company in 2007.  She created PCS in true "Necessity is the Mother of Invention" form.  "PCS was born through a medical experience with my son," says Shara. "I needed something to help my son come to terms with his prosthetic eye and new glasses and the changes taking place in our lives. I created 2 books that would address his situation and had his  teachers read them in class, helping the other children understand our situation. I used personal photos and a personal text making the books completely custom to my son's needs. He loved them, read them daily and within about three weeks, his behavior had modified (keeping his eye in, keeping his glasses on, etc)." 

Shara saw her triumph as an opportunity to help other children and families with special needs or any needs when it comes to rearing and growing up.  "Who doesn't have issues with their own kids from potting training to hitting to biting to sharing? What kids don't need to learn to count or to learn positive meanings for the letters of the alphabet? What child doesn't have a need for a self esteem building name book? Anything and everything goes here and I have my son to thank for being my inspiration!"

All PCS books are custom written, designed, laminated, and bound from scratch. They work great for infants (safe and soft), toddlers (pages can't be torn), early readers (some pages can be used with dry erase markers to practice writing, etc) and children with special needs (seeing their own photos is an effective learning strategy for positive behavior modification).  Shara enjoys the positive feedback from children and parents about how the personalized books touched their lives, brought encouragement, and helped them learn something new.  Shara has launched a page on the PCS site completely devoted to products for special needs children and is currently expanding her product line to include laminated flash cards for all children.

You can see the entire collection of Personal Child Stories on the website www.personalchildstories.com.  Create a lasting memory and fun learning tool for your child!

ScreamFree Parenting is a radically new approach to parenting that encourages and teaches parents to take care of themselves and their marriage while creating loving and understanding relationships with their children.  Licensed Professional Counselor turned Certified Professional Coach, Tara S. Dickherber, M.Ed, CPC incorporated this new coaching method into her practice to improve self-confidence and healthy parent-child relationships.

"I began as a counselor working in many different capacities: equine therapy, case manager, group therapist, school counselor, and individual counselor in private practice," says Tara.  "I attended a seminar about coaching and realized my counseling style was exactly that; coaching and the greater possibilities to reach more people as a coach than a counselor.  Thus I began my training as a coach.  In coaching I have combined my love for helping others and my passion for yoga to assist people in creating balance for life, which lends itself to also helping them improve their self-confidence.  I have always loved working with children and parents so after I discovered ScreamFree Parenting I knew I had to add that tool to my repertoire."

ScreamFree Parenting is a system developed by Hal Edward Runkel, LCSW that is not all about the children but about the parent.  "I came across this book will looking for parenting books for myself and my husband after our daughter was born," explains Tara.  "I was obviously caught up by the title itself.  When I began to listen to the book I realized it spoke directly to my motto in my personal life and my professional life: we must take care of ourselves first before we take care of anyone else.  If we do not no on else will take care of us and this may possibly lead to us not being able to care for anyone.  So when the opportunity arose to study with Hal Runkel himself to become a Certified ScreamFree Parent Leader I jumped at the chance.  It was the most wonderful, and grueling training I had ever been too.  Hal's philosophy is that we all need to know what our unresolved issues are and work on them, so it was actually a two day session of group therapy.  Personally I have found this parenting theory to be an amazing way to connect to my daughter.  I feel so blessed every day that I found ScreamFree early on so that we can start off creating a loving lasting relationship.  One of the theories within this process is to create space so that as parents we do not become emotionally reactive.  This comes in so handy now that my daughter has begun to creep into the "terrible twos" and is starting to have temper tantrums.  If I were to become emotionally reactive to them they would just get worse and last longer.  The challenge is the ScreamFree way is hard, there is no easy out button, but isn't anything hard totally worth the journey?"

In the near future, the ScreamFree system will be expanding to include ScreamFree Living and ScreamFree Marriage.  Tara plans to continue to expand and grow her coaching practice and looking to include Certified ScreamFree Marriage Leader to her programs.  "Personally I plan to continue to utilize the ScreamFree philosophy as a parent and just enjoy watching my daughter grow and develop."

For more information or to contact Tara Dickherber for ScreamFree Parenting, click here.

Wouldn't it be nice if we could just get along?  But, if we got along wouldn't we still be married?

I have asked myself that very question regarding my post divorce relationship, but as often happens, the years that follow a divorce involve frustrating, infuriating and hurtful exchanges, especially when trying to raise children.

Parenting together is hard, parenting apart can be impossible.  It is inevitable that one party is the "left" party and the anger that comes with that can lay the groundwork for years of frustrating encounters.

So, how do you communicate and co-parent, when dealing with an ex-spouse that is thorny on their best day?  Well, the first thing to remember is that it is all about the children.  Keeping that mantra in your head will help you get through even the worst encounters with your ex.

Try to remember that you are now in the "business" of raising your children.  If you can't get along, try to limit your face to face interactions and talk by email, text, fax or phone.  This saves the children from seeing and hopefully hearing any negative interaction between you and your now "business" partner.

Makes notes about the issues that you need to discuss.  Hit them one point at a time.  If you are communicating by email, make sure to number the points.  Attention spans can be short and the more concise and brief you are, the greater your chances of success.
 
Read before sending!  Typing in anger won't get you anywhere.  So, type your message, take a breath, and then reread and revise.  Take your time and make sure you are not placing blame, even though you believe it can be placed.  You get further when you pose issues as concerns, rather than pointing fingers.

Consider every co-parenting situation with your former spouse as a test. The immediate goal is to resolve the current issue, but the ultimate goal is to walk away from any interaction, no matter how unpleasant, with a greater sense of peace. 

Photo Credit © Andreas Gradin | Dreamstime.com

I've been heard telling my kids that they are like buzzing bees. I'm usually exasperated when I use this description and wanting them to stop buzzing about in a frenzy. Over the last week I have seen the positive side to my personal hive of bees. It's true they are busy, creative and in need of stimulation but there is more to them than constant motion.

As you have read, we launched a family enterprise that includes all our household community. The very people who have been friends and neighbors have slowly become our family over the years and now an integral part of our lives. We have become a giant communal think tank. But our kids have been the most transformed. They are clipping threads, folding bags, ironing logos, cutting handles and enjoying the prospect of a successful family business. Not a grumble has been uttered or a request to do something else has been heard. This is the benefit of a healthy hive grinding together toward a common goal. Our bees are ready and willing to work hard.

As a parent it has become evident that we need to teach our kids financial responsibility, solid business practices and how to think out of the box in the coming years as our economy finds it's feet again. It is never too early to instill these key elements into our kids minds. Years ago we owned and operated a cafe, our children were very young, but as our new endeavor has unfolded they have mentioned things that they learned from the cafe. I would have never believed they were paying attention, but they were and the business tidbits they gleaned are playing a role in our bag business. This fact alone has solidified my own resolve to keep teaching them more about how a business should be run.

No matter what you may have or are involved with, whether a networking, direct sales or a volunteer organization; your kids can learn from it and help to their own capacity. Have them stuff envelopes or place stamps, fold letters or organize inventory. Any job is a learning experience. If you do not have a business of your own, consider letting your kids have a beverage stand in your yard. If neighbors or friends have a yard sale, have your child ask to set up at the sale and offer a percentage of the sales back to the person who let them do it. Most people are glad to be helpful and not want to accept, but remind them that you are teaching your kids the rules of business.

Now that my kids are a bit older I have them pay me back for their supplies when they have made enough to cover them and still feel successful. Last year they worked hard enough to save and buy a puppy. One of our sons has a raking business that he started when he was six for our neighbors and their grandma. He eventually made enough to buy his own snowboard, bindings and a lift ticket. Our oldest son is more apt to spend and never save. He wants the money but not the work, but as he has seen the other three take a different road, it has become unavoidable for him to not understand that one way works far better than the other. We have let him live with the consequences of this and there is no better teacher than when two kids have enough money to buy an ice cream cone on a hot day and the other two spent everything they had on Pokemon cards the day before. The phrase "poetic justice" is well known around here.

I want our kids to know how to figure things out, how to think and decide a course to follow. I pray for them to endeavor toward goodness and love. Not only has this work been great for our children, I have also learned everyday from our adventures together. It's never too early or too late to start a business and reap the benefits of the education it will give you. Whether it becomes a lasting and solid business or a flash in the pan, you will learn so much and so will your children. 

Photo Credit © Don Oehman | Dreamstime.com