Recently by Christine Spencer

BECOME your Extraordinary SELF!

Be open to the lessons ...walk through life open to self improvement that which is best to help you evolve.

Control you own destiny
Is it going to be easy...is the path going to have no obstacles...

NO...

Yet, they can be overcome.

If things go wrong, you hit a dead end-as you will- we all do
It's just life's way of saying time to change course.

If you ask the life quest... Not... Why is this happening to me?
But... What is this here to teach me?

You will move forward, grow and enrich your spirit.

Photo Credit © Taiga | Dreamstime.com

Have you ever been betrayed?

Have you ever had the feeling?

It knocks the breath out of you hard; you feel pain in your heart

It makes one feel like a fool

I know this is a sensitive subject to chat about, but I thought I would share my experience with you all at an age of 47...it still happens!

Do not follow where the path may lead.  Go, instead, where there is no path and leave a trail.  ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Friendship is one of the most divine relationships of all. It carries the essence of all other relations. There are no expectations in friendship and neither are there any limits. Friendship is no less than a spiritual bond between two individuals.

True friends are hard to find and even harder to keep. With increasing dishonesty, corruption, and disloyalty, it is hard to find the right person to trust and accept as a friend. With so many people believing in gossip and cheap plots, betrayal of friendship has become very common. People are so self absorbed these days that they don't tend to see whether the friends they have are trustworthy individuals or not. Worse are those people who betray true friends because of materialistic pleasures. Coping up with friends cheating is quite hard, more so if you have no fault of yours. But, life goes on and you make new friends. You push away your hurtful past and learn a valuable lesson from it.

When friends let you down and are not there for you when you need them the most, it is known as betrayal. Sometimes the reason why friends betray you is just not known. When you are at the receiving end, you feel hurt, confused and angry. You demand answers as to why have you been betrayed for absolutely no fault of yours. The talks end abruptly, phone calls are not returned, letters remain unanswered and there is no contact whatsoever.

SHATTERED, furious, resentful, heartbroken, numb, humiliated, rejected, hurt, and NOT SAFE - these are just some of the feelings we experience when we've been betrayed.

It is ok to give yourself permission upset, hurt, ticked off, frustrated, sad and even disappointed...AND THEN MOVE ON!  Because at some point, hate, anger, sadness will CONSUME you!

You will have to come to terms with reality and accept that things were not meant to be.
Though it may seem like the end of the world, there are ways to cope up with it.

    * Determine if the whole thing was a misunderstanding. It's easy to get emotional (positive or negative) with friends and you may have rushed to conclusions.

    * Keep things in perspective.

    * Be willing to forgive despite your anger. This is key to getting past your anger towards them and not harboring grudges.

    * Consider whether or not you want to maintain a friendly relationship with the person. Many times, a friend that betrays once will do it again.
 
    * Try to relax and take some time alone. Meditate, shop, dance, do whatever you have to do to make yourself happy. You are more likely to find a worthwhile solution while doing something you enjoy.


There is no point in dragging along a friendship when you know you are not comfortable with it. End it politely and quickly and most importantly, don't regret your action. If you start feeling sorry, you are putting yourself in trouble. There is a reason for every action you take and you must have thought a lot about it before making a decision. Learn to trust your gut feelings (intuitions) and have confidence in yourself.

Remembered is that these betrayals are experiences that teach you valuable lessons in life.

Nobody's journey is seamless or smooth, we all stumble, and we all have setbacks. If things go wrong, you hit a dead end as you will...it's just life's way of saying time to change course. Every failures, every crisis, every difficult time...ASK YOURSELF...

WHAT IS THIS SUPPOSE TO TEACH ME?

NOT...

Why is this happening to me?

YET...

What is this suppose to teach me?

KNOW YOUR OWN WORTH...KNOW YOUR OWN POWER

Don't be afraid to seek help and talk about it to others. Such betrayals should not stop you from trusting people and making new friends.

Tips

    * Follow your instincts and past experiences when it comes to trusting people. There are, obviously, some people you can never trust and some people you can.

    * One of the things I have tried very hard to eliminate from my life is negativity. Negativity is nothing but toxic energy. This toxic energy can come in the form of toxic people, or energy whose only job is to suck and drain the life out of you; or toxic situations. When I find myself in one of these toxic environments, be it with people or circumstances, if I cannot turn the situation around, then I merely excuse myself and remove myself.

Live consciously, stay in the present moment. This is difficult to do if you are prone towards worrying about the future and fretting over the past.

The past has NO power and the future has NO presence

What you really want is to be surrounded by people you trust and treasure and people that cherish you.

Some people come into our lives and quickly go.  Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.  ~Flavia Weedn

I truly hope you can benefit from my journey and discover the support to get over any betrayals in your life with grace and ease.

Photo Credit © Astroid | Dreamstime.com

Give yourself permission...

I'm pent up. Pressure, pressure, pressure. I need to vent, cut loose. I'm always on my best behavior. I can't remember the last time I did something silly or fun, laugh out loud...Sound familiar? What does it mean to have fun? What does it mean to have a good time? "

The proper function of man is to live - not to exist." -- Jack London

Do you ever feel like the energizer bunny?

Too often we go through life on autopilot, going through the motions and having each day pass like the one before it. Going, going and going.

That's fine, and comfortable, until you have gone through another year without having done anything, without having really lived life.

That's fine, until you have reached old age and look back on life with regrets.

That's fine; until you see your kids go off to college and realize that you missed their childhoods.

It's not fine. If you want to truly live life, to really experience it, to enjoy it to the fullest, instead of barely scraping by and only living a life of existence, then you need to find ways to break free from the mold and drink from life.

What follows is just a list of ideas suggested by Leo Babauta, obvious ones mostly that you could have thought of yourself, but that I hope are useful reminders. .

Love
Perhaps the most important. Fall in love, if you aren't already. If you have, fall in love with your partner all over again. Abandon caution and let your heart be broken. Or love family members, friends, anyone -- it doesn't have to be romantic love. Love all of humanity, one person at a time. 

Get outside
Don't let yourself be shut indoors. Go out when it's raining. Walk on the beach. Hike through the woods. Swim in a freezing lake. Bask in the sun. Play sports, or walk barefoot through grass. Pay close attention to nature.

Savor food
Don't just eat your food, but really enjoy it. Feel the texture, the bursts of flavors. Savor every bite. If you limit your intake of sweets, it will make the small treats you give yourself (berries or dark chocolate are my favorites) even more enjoyable. And when you do have them, really, really savor them. Slowly.

Create a morning ritual.
Wake early and greet the day. Watch the sun rise. Out loud, tell yourself that you will not waste this day, which is a gift. You will be compassionate to your fellow human beings, and live every moment to its fullest. Stretch or meditate or exercise as part of your ritual. Enjoy some coffee.

Follow excitement
Try to find the things in life that excite you, and then go after them. Make life one exciting adventure.

Find your passion
Make your living by doing the thing you love to do. First, think about what you really love to do. There may be many things. Find out how you can make a living doing it. It may be difficult, but you only live once. .

Get out of your cubicle
Do you sit all day in front of computer, shuffling papers and taking phone calls and chatting on the Internet? Don't waste your days like this. Break free from the cubicle environment, and do your work on a laptop, in a coffee shop, or on a boat, or in a log cabin. This may require a change of jobs, or becoming a freelancer. It's worth it. .

Travel
Sure, you want to travel some day. When you have vacation time, or when you're older. Well, what are you waiting for? Find a way to take a trip, if not this month, then sometime soon. You may need to sell your car or stop your cable bill and stop eating out to do it, but make it happen. You are too young to not see the world. If need be, find a way to make a living by freelancing, then work while you travel. Only work an hour or two a day. Don't check email but once a week. Then use the rest of the time to see the world. 

Rediscover what's important
Take an hour and make a list of everything that's important to you. Add to it everything that you want to do in life. Now cut that list down to 4-5 things. Just the most important things in your life. This is your core list. This is what matters. Focus your life on these things. Make time for them.

Exercise
Get off the couch and go for a walk. Eventually try running. Or do some pushups and crunches. Or swim or bike or row. Or go for a hike. Whatever you do, get active, and you'll love it. And life will be more alive.

Be positive
Learn to recognize the negative thoughts you have. These are the self-doubts, the criticisms of others, the complaints, the reasons you can't do something. Then stop yourself when you have these thoughts, and replace them with positive thoughts. Solutions. You can do this! .

Kiss in the rain
Seize the moment and be romantic. Raining outside? Grab your lover and give her a passionate kiss. Driving home, Stop the car and pick some wildflowers. Send a love note. Dress sexy. 

Slow down
Life moves along at such a rapid pace these days. It's not healthy, and it's not conducive to living. Practice doing everything slowly -- everything, from eating to walking to driving to working to reading. Enjoy what you do.

Play with children
Children, more than anyone else, know how to live. They experience everything in the moment, fully. When they get hurt, they really cry. When they play, they really have fun. Learn from them, instead of thinking you know so much more than them. Play with them, and learn to be joyful like them.

Take mini-retirements
Don't leave the joy of retirement until you are too old to enjoy it. Do it now, while you're young. It makes working that much more worth it. Find ways to take a year off every few years. Save up; sell your home, your possessions, and travel. Live simply, but live, without having to work. Enjoy life, then go back to work and save up enough money to do it again in a couple of years.

Do nothing.
Despite the tip above that we should find excitement, there is value in doing nothing as well. Not doing nothing as in reading, or taking a nap, or watching TV, or meditating. Doing nothing as in sitting there, doing nothing. Just learning to be still, in silence, to hear our inner voice, to be in tune with life. Do this daily if possible.

Watch sunsets, daily
One of the most beautiful times of day. Make it a daily ritual to find a good spot to watch the sunset, perhaps having a light dinner while you do so. 

Break out from ruts
Do you do things the same way every day? Change it up. Try something new. Take a different route to work. Start your day out differently. Approach work from a new angle. Look at things from new perspectives.

Laugh till you cry
Laughing is one of the best ways to live. Tell jokes and laugh your head off. Watch an awesome comedy. Learn to laugh at anything. Roll on the ground laughing. You'll love it.

Make an awesome dessert
I like to make warm, soft chocolate cake. But even berries dipped in chocolate, or crepes with ice cream and fruit, or fresh apple pie, or homemade chocolate chip cookies or brownies, are great. This isn't an everyday thing, but an occasional treat thing. But it's wonderful.

Try something new, every week
 Ask yourself: "What new thing shall I try this week?" Then be sure to do it. You don't have to learn a new language in one week, but seek new experiences. Give it a try. You might decide you want to keep it in your life. 

Be in the moment
Instead of thinking about things you need to do, or things that have happened to you, or worrying or planning or regretting, think about what you are doing, right now. What is around you? What smells and sounds and sights and feelings are you experiencing? Learn to do this as much as possible through meditation, but also through bringing your focus back to the present as much as you can in everything you do.

There comes a point in your life when you realize
 
who matters,
 
who never did,
 
who won't anymore...
 
and who always will.
 
So, don't worry about people from your past,
 
there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.
 
 
It's about love, it's about compassion, it's about kindness, and faith. It has nothing to do with luck. You get what you give so give good.  

No matter who you are, where you live, how rich you are or what your age is, life happens to all of us! However, we are all different and we need to find your own way.  
 
"One size fits all" as they say, does not apply here. There are so many preconceived notions about how life 'should' be lived.
 
How to begin: 
Transformation begins when we stretch our boundaries and ask basic questions: What's my role here? What do I really want? What are my passions? Where am I going?
 
What would your life be like if you were doing what you love, with the people you love, in places you love? It's called a passionate life and there is a simple, effective way to discover your passions so you can create that kind of life. Combine purpose, awareness and dedication to guide your future. Strategy is a necessity for victory in personal life and business. Focus on something greater than yourself and bring integrity into every aspect of life. Investigate your ideals, ethics, principles, then learn to cultivate the passion and the clear thinking which will lead you to your highest goals. Be clear about your methods.
 
"Be victorious. When we recognize our desire to matter, to make a difference, when we are in touch with the yearning in our hearts and souls to be a contribution to life, we want to be worthy of that charge. We become more aware of our talents, the possibilities that we have to make a difference in the lives around us whether in small daily actions or in large strokes. We feel a part of the world around us and want to do our part to make it a better place. We start to develop our gifts and remove the blocks to being the best person we can be".
 
If you feel you compromising, use these three steps to restore your integrity!
 
Step One: Create a Life Purpose statement that gives clarity about your beliefs, vision and desires. 
 
Step Two: Ask yourself: When your 95 years old, what will you want to say about your life?
 
Step Three: Identify where you are not being truthful in your life. 
Your mission is not where you currently are, but where you want to be. Be sure to write all of these things down in the present tense--claim it! 
 
How do you know whether you're on the right path, with the right person, or in the right job? The same you know when you're not: You feel it.
 
Each of us has a personal greatness- and because yours is as unique to you as your fingerprint, no one can tell you want it is.
 
Be mindful on purpose
 
Live Consciously, 
The past has NO power and the future has NO presence

When was the last time that you played an enjoyable game?  
 
If you quit playing because it is a child's sport, then you are wrong.
 
 As George Bernard Shaw said, 
"We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing."
 
We know that kids, through play, can learn to make choices
and develop self confidence. They learn to try and try until they succeed, they learn to help others, and they even learn when to give up. 
 
Do we as grownups tend to forget that? They are unraveling the world at their own pace, they are in control. When was the last time we felt like that?! 
 
Friedrich Froebel said, "Play is the highest expression of human development in childhood, for it alone is the free expression of what is in a child's soul." 
 
If we could take a peek into our play less soul what would we find?!
 
I know it's a fast word out there, but we should pick our own speed, not just jump into the whirl. We should go back to basics. 
 
"Be daring, be different, be impractical, 
be anything that will assert integrity of purpose and
imaginative vision against the play-it-safers, the creatures of the
commonplace, the slaves of the ordinary." (C. Beaton) 

Author: Daniel Ng

YouTube video of Susan Boyle is taking the Internet by storm, the video clip has been watched more than 5 million times in just 4 days.  
 
Who is Susan Boyle?  
Susan Boyle is a contestant on Britain's Got Talent. She's 47, lives along with a cat. She's frumpy, unemployed, from a small Scottish village. She is unmarried, and never been kissed. Her previous singing experience was limited to the church choir and karaoke. she was treated as a laughing stock when she walked on stage, the audience laughed and the judges shook their heads in disbelief as she said she would like to be as successful as Elaine Paige. In most respects, you might look at this kind of person many as Loser. And now, go and watch her performance here! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY. Trust me, It's must watch video, well worth the 7 minutes it takes to view !
 
Wow! Wow! Wow!  
 
Gosh! What an amazing voice and stunning performance. When Susan Boyle turned mockery into awe and laughter into tears. I thought, what a lesson in humility this is for all of us,  
 
"Everyone laughed at you but no-one is laughing now. I'm reeling with shock." Holden added: "It's the biggest wake-up call ever." Yup! It's the biggest wake-up call for all of us, There are so many lessons that we can learn from this woman's story. We are just like the three judges and the audience that always love to judge people by appearance and only think the pretty and good looking are expected to achieve. It was rude, cruel and arrogant. Hopefully we learned the old adage: never judge a book by its cover.  
 
Now go and watch her story HERE, you will definitely love this lady more!  
 
From The Herald  
Susan is a reminder that it's time we all looked a little deeper. She has lived an obscure but important life. She has been a companionable and caring daughter. It's people like her who are the unseen glue in society; the ones who day in and day out put themselves last. They make this country civilized and they deserve acknowledgment and respect.
 
Susan Boyle - you GO girl!

DO YOU JUDGE OTHER BY THE WAY THEY LOOK?  
 
*The more we accept ourselves, valuing ourselves inside as well as out, the more we accept other people. By seeing that we are all attractive in our own way, we stop belittling ourselves and others. "Our lack of compassion stems from our inability to see deeply into the nature of things."

Don't wait for time. Make it. Don't wait for love. Feel it. Don't wait for money. Earn it. Don't wait for the path. Find it. Don't wait for opportunity. Create it. Don't go for less. Get the best. Don't compare. Be unique. Don't fight your misfortune. Transform it. Don't avoid failure. Use it. Don't dwell on a mistake. Learn from it. Don't back down. Go around. Don't close your eyes. Open your mind. Don't run for life. Embrace it.

You are capable of achieving anything you put your mind to! The second you start living by this truth, is the second you can start creating your life the way it should be. Everyone on this planet has limitless capabilities as long as they realize that themselves.

We create our own reality. How we perceive the world and ourselves create our beliefs. These beliefs are imprinted on our subconscious mind, which direct us to take action underneath everything that's going on in your mind.

Before we actually do something there is an impulse before the action is actually made. Your subconscious mind creates impulses, and then your conscious mind sorts out those impulses and decides whether or not to take action. If you change the way your subconscious mind makes impulses, you change the way you act and the way you think. Change your self confidence and you will go from making negative actions, to positive ones.

You deserve to accomplish anything you wish. Anything you want is out there for you to grab.

Life is to short and to amazing to live on the sidelines. Get in the game, and experience what it is like to truly be alive. You can have anything you want out of life, but it begins with you first. Develop your inner self, and then develop your world. Give up your excuses and I don't know hows. Take action today!

We all get so comfortable and used to running on the treadmill of life, that we never stop to decide what we are actually wanting to accomplish.
 
Whatever it may be you have to decide. We can all get preoccupied with running on the treadmill of life...NOT being living consciously, fully present.

Don't lose sight of your path, too often it goes undiscovered. It can get overgrown with distractions and can become hard to find if our time is spent on too many other things.

  Get off the treadmill and just go for it!

After taking care of everyone else, they are always putting themselves last on the list, and often have very little left to give. There are many women who aren't living--they just exist.

You have to step out of your comfort zone and do something different if you want the results in your life to change.

Words of inspiration lift the spirit, boost morale and nudge you in the direction you want to go. No tow people are inspired quite the same way, and what inspires is a unique as the sound of your laughter. No tow people are inspired quite the same way. One person's inspiration may come from reading a book, poem or quote. Another may be inspired by music, the sound of children's laughter or silence that encourages reflective thinking. If you feel uninspired and long to rekindle the glowing coals of your life into a roaring fire, try using the following tips. Let a few words of inspiration sink in as you ponder the possibilities of living an inspired life.

What is Inspiration?
"It's never too late to be what you might have been." - George Eliot
The American Heritage Dictionary defines inspiration as, "stimulation of the mind or emotions to a high level if feelings or activity." Who doesn't want to be inspired and experience heightened emotions and the joyful sense of satisfaction from achieving? Without inspiration, innovative ideas have no chance of taking flight; in fact, they fail to exist. As the pressures of mundane existence consume most of our time, we might let some earlier dreams or goals go by. In this quote, Eliot Speaks to his reader's doubts and assures them that it's never too late to turn around and discover your dreams.

Get Inspired

"Life Shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." - Anais Nin

One can only be inspired if one is willing to take action and seek inspiration. Like the Nike as that insists, "Just do it," pushing yourself and taking action gets results. Ask yourself this question, "How do I get inspired?"  Think of past inspirational moments. What were you doing? Where were you?  Was anyone with you? Inspiration can come from almost anywhere, at any time and often from unlikely sources.

From pushing yourself to run that extra quarter mile in the morning to working towards a goal of stating your own business, words of inspiration can be the catalyst that gives you the courage to make it happen.

Find Inspiration
"As I grow older part of my emotional survival plan must be to actively seek inspiration instead of passively waiting for it to find me." - Bebe Moore Campbell
If you are wondering where to find inspiration, you can find it everywhere you look. For some people, inspiration comes after reading a book; for others, seeing an exquisite sunset can inspire them. Inspiration may come to you while taking a shower or jogging down the road while most of the world still sleeps.

An inspiring speech may move you to take action or you may discover that it was right there in front of you the whole time
.
Find Inspiration Within You

"Every person, especially every woman, should be alone sometime during the year, some part of each week, and each day." -Anne Morrow Lindbergh

The world within you is too often untapped due to lack of time and the demands of others. Find some time each day to ponder you and all that you are and wish to be. Journal, meditate, go for a walk alone. Create a space where you can be alone with your thoughts.

Invite Inspiration
"One of the secrets of a happy life is continuous small treats." - Iris Mudoch

Words can take the most stoic person's breath away. Beautiful, haunting words can inspire people to do all sorts of unexpected things.
Find a short inspirational quote and turn it into your mantra for success and motivation. Like a continuous small treat, words of inspiration constantly reassure when feelings of doubt enter the mind and soul. Read your word treat every day as an affirmation to find inspiration and live a fuller life.

Stake Your Inspirational Claim
"You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it." - Margaret Thatcher

When words of inspiration fail to spark the proper feeling, it's time to head out the door and into the world. Take a walk through the park, sip on tea at a café and watch people or even go to a movie. Just being outdoors and indulging your senses can revive you. Before you know it, the well that seemed dry refills with life experiences and you feel exhilarated.

Benefit from Inspiration
"Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on other without getting a few drops on yourself." Ralph Waldo Emerson

An inspired person is a motivated person who takes action. The benefit from being inspired come with moving in a direction that you wish to go. The inspirations to paint a picture, write a book, move to a different country or start you own business puts the wheels in motion. Whether your achievement touches only you or millions of others, You will feel a true sense of self and wonderment at the journey.

Carl Jung thought about a benefit of being inspired that you may not have considered," Nothing has a stronger influence psychologically on their environment and especially their children than the unlived life of the parent." Think of the pride your child and family exhibit when you achieve your heart's desire or goals. It's a spine-tingling moment when a child tells apparent how proud she is of her mom.

Inspiration, like a lover, makes people shiver with anticipation and delight in the adventure. That "a-ha" moment brings a smile to the face and suddenly the world seems less daunting. It's a great way to feel!

Whether the inspiration came from people watching, stopping to really see the beauty of a flower or from words of inspiration, it's been discovered. Once you become inspired, hold fast to what inspired you and why. The saying, "get out there, follow your dream..." should move you forward. One last quote to inspire you on your journey is:
"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

ARE YOU LIVING YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST?
James Dean once said, "Dream as if you'll live forever, and live as if you'll die today."

Do you take time to pursue your passions or are you a slave to the daily grind?