By Jean Haner

Thirty years ago, I married into a Chinese family. But it wasn’t until a few years after the wedding that I discovered how truly tolerant my mother-in-law really was - because I didn’t have “moneybags” in my face I wasn’t a lucky match for her son!

My mother-in-law introduced me to face reading, and at first, I thought it was a ridiculous superstition – and how abhorrent to judge someone based on their appearance! It wasn’t until I began to study with master teachers that I discovered the deeper principles of face reading, and learned that it has nothing to do with “luck” and everything to do with learning to be true to your nature.

Face reading is actually an ancient branch of Chinese medicine. It was at first used as a diagnostic tool for health. But physicians soon realized face reading also revealed someone’s inner personality, what they needed to be happy in life, what careers would suit them best, and what their purpose in the world would be. Thousands of years ago, face readers were the original therapists and personal coaches – the ones we consulted for guidance in love, career and life path.

I teach workshops to help you read the photos in those online dating sites, or to understand who’s really sitting across from you in the candle-lit restaurant! The first thing to know is that there are no bad combinations. Any relationship can be successful; it’s a matter of awareness and understanding. The more insights you gain into your date’s true nature, the more easily love can grow.

You cannot single out one feature on someone’s face and know all about who they are, of course. Instead, it’s seeing how the features together reveal the choreography of that person’s unique inner dance. But there are certainly details you can notice on someone’s face that can help you understand some important aspects of their personality.

So in this light, let me share with you some insights you may get from the face of the one you adore!

Eyebrows: Full, long eyebrows indicate someone who loves to be active both in work and play. Especially if they also have a strong jaw, they’re not going to be happy lounging on the couch with you – instead they want to go out for a run! They’re likely to be confident and assertive, but also have more potential for anger and frustration than other people. They seek challenge and won’t back down from an argument. This kind of person has a wonderfully logical mind and is excellent at solving problems or creating a plan to reach a goal. But they don’t like to dilly-dally and have no patience for people who can’t make up their minds. They love to just “do it!”

By the way, any woman who has naturally thick eyebrows but plucks them too much can diminish her level of self-confidence or her ability to be assertive. And a woman who reduces her strong eyebrows into pencil-thin ones can actually develop an anger problem!

Eyes: They say the eyes are the “window to the soul” but in Chinese face reading, they’re considered to be the window to the heart. One of the messages someone’s eyes reveal is how easily they communicate their most private, heartfelt feelings.

If your date has very deep-set eyes, or holds their eyes in a narrowed fashion, you’ll probably find that they can’t easily talk about their more difficult emotions, even with the people they’re closest to. They may also be more skeptical overall, meaning you’ll need to work to earn their trust. However, once you do, they’re your friend forever.

Someone with large eyes, especially if they are held very wide open, tend to wear their heart on their sleeves. They’ll express their feelings very easily and may not understand when others can’t be as open in communications. They may be overly-trusting or even gullible.

Neither kind of eye is right or wrong – it all comes down to what’s most comfortable for you. If you’re someone who takes some time to warm up to others and let them in, you may find a wide-eyed date a bit too much to take! If you value open communications and don’t understand why anyone would prefer to keep some things unspoken, you may feel hurt and frustrated by someone who, for instance, doesn’t like to talk about your relationship but would rather sit on the couch and watch the game together!

Mouth: A large mouth with full lips reveals someone for whom relationships are very important. They’re generous and emotionally available - sometimes too much so! Others who don’t share this priority may judge them as demanding or overly-involved in the lives of their friends or family. Someone with a very small mouth compared to the size of their other features may have less need for relationship, or alternatively can act a bit needy or clingy with friends or in romance.

Jaw: The Chinese call the jaw “the roots of the tree.” A tree with strong roots can’t easily be pushed over. This means that someone with a large, or highly-defined jaw can’t be easily influenced - they have strong values and firm beliefs. They’ll stand up for what they believe in, but may not be so open to other people’s ideas. They size you up quickly – they’ll likely make a decision about you the moment you walk in the door. A very strong jaw indicates a judgmental personality who may leap to conclusions too quickly!

Someone with a narrow jaw will be more flexible, and able to listen to all sides of an argument. However, they may be indecisive or too easily influenced by what others say.

Chin: The chin reveals the level of someone’s willpower – the more prominent the chin, the greater their tenacity and determination. Once they set their mind to something, they’ll stick with it till they reach their goal. This can also translate into a stubborn nature! And if you know someone with a chin that sticks out and then up, you may as well throw up your hands and give up now, as you’ll never be able to make them do anything they don’t want to!

If someone has a receding chin, this is an indication they might have been oppressed early in life; not allowed to exert their willpower. They may lack confidence or give up too early when the going gets tough. On the other hand, because they know what it feels like to be the underdog, they may develop incredible strength in helping the little guy!

Using the wisdom of your face, you can move from reaction and judgment to a place of love and compassion, not only in romance, but for whoever you encounter in life. Even more importantly, you can look at that reflection in the mirror and truly say, “I love you.”

Jean Haner, the author of The Wisdom of Your Face and The Wisdom of Your Child’s Face, teaches compassionate and affirming ways for people to understand their true nature and to look with love at everyone in their lives. Jean is well known for providing fun, fascinating and practical information that can be put to immediate use in your life. Learn more at www.wisdomofyourface.com.

© Jean Haner, 2011

Photo credit © Theodor38 | Dreamstime.com

Tags: Chinese, dating, face reading, judgement, love, reaction, relationships