You’re now grown up with a job, spouse, and maybe have kids. Not to mention, most people nowadays have more than one job to keep up with their daily lives. With all these demands, your reality is a busy one. You can see how easy it is to lose contact with all your friends and maintain friendships. Here are some pointers on what you should do now to become a better friend.
How to Become a Better Friend
Pointers on what you should do now
First and foremost, yet probably the most important rule, try to make the first contact. Once you establish that, the rest should be pretty easy. If it’s a close friend, they’ll take the time to communicate back. When they do, make sure you keep the ball rolling. Don’t be afraid to laugh and ask many questions. Be sincere and curious with what they’ve been doing currently. You’ll find yourself excited to tell them all about what had happened in your life since you last spoke. Do not take yourself too seriously when you speak. If you do, you may come off as being bland or standoffish. You’ll likely find yourself in a dull conversation. Try to drop your guard even if it’s been a long time. They’re your friends and they’ll be happy to finally hear from you. Once you do all that, you’ll be pleasantly surprised when you do engage. It’ll feel like not one day has passed by.
When your friend does make the effort to get in contact with you, make sure you answer back with equal determination. When someone is trying to get hold of you, you’ve been on their mind. This is a positive sign and you should be flattered. Also, try not to play tag with voice messages or texts. A phone call is much more personal. It’s nice to hear your friend’s voice rather than messaging, posts and emails. The art of conversation can never be replaced by exchanging text and voice messages. When messaging, it’s difficult to convey human emotion. In many cases, a short text or voice message can be misconstrued as being stoic. When it’s a dear friend, they much rather hear your voice. Make that phone call and get out of your comfort zone.
Send an invite
With Facebook, Instagram, and other popular social media platforms it’s easy to set up an invite for a social event. In return, you get many invites on the daily from various social media sites. If and when you do receive one from a friend, go to it! You’ll be surprised how much fun these events can be, no matter how inconvenient they might seem at the time. It’s a great way to catch up and enjoy something that can potentially be fun. If you happen to be the one planning a social gathering, take advantage of these tools to contact your friends yourself. Everyone loves receiving an invite from their social media channels. When you take the time to send one to your friend, it lets them know that you are thinking of them.
In the instance you reach a friend who may be down, take the time to genuinely listen to them. Don’t be afraid to make eye contact. It’ll show them that you are sincere and that you are paying attention. Be inquisitive and let them take control of the conversation. If you can, try not to judge and hear them out. After you assess their situation, you may have some advice you’d want to share. For example, recommending programs that help with recovery. Be sure to choose your words wisely and show some empathy. Kindly suggest your program. You may have to suffer some criticism. There also may be a chance that they’ll be defensive. You shouldn’t let that fret you. Consistency followed by compassion is always the best approach. Your friend needs to know they are not alone in the world. You already made the most important step by taking time out of your day to talk with them by trying to help. Now be a true friend and guide them towards the right path to recovery.
Lastly and probably the most fun, though hardest to pull off, plan an outing or a trip! It doesn’t have to be a week-long getaway in a foreign country. It can be a day at the beach or the nearest town. You can spend time like the good old days plus share new experiences. After the trip is done, plan the next outing!
A little goes a long way. It all starts with you making the first contact. Next following through with your plans and having a good time. Finally, express your appreciation and make sure to plan the next outing. Don’t let too much time pass. Drop them a line now and then to keep in touch. If you do that, you’ll become a better friend and develop a lasting friendship.